(Interview) Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh (Traci N. Fitzhugh, MD, FACOG)
Ronn: Thank you for accepting my interview request. I’m very excited about being a father and I want to share that with the world as well as help to educate people about fatherhood. Being a father isn’t just about paying the child’s expenses. So much goes into being a father beyond finances. Today I want to focus on health as it relates to the pregnancy.
Q1 – So tell me about yourself and why you became an OBGYN.
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: I’ve been practicing obstetrics and gynecology for about ten years and I’ve been married to my husband for eight years. We have two precious sons who are 6 and 3 years respectively. My husband is an exceptional father and he takes the privilege of fatherhood quite seriously which is one of many things that I sincerely respect about him.
I chose to be a ObGyn because its an opportunity to positively impact families through women who are mothers, wives, daughters and sisters. Its also very “results oriented” which appeals to my need to see the outcomes of my work. I enjoy that my chosen field of medicine is very hands on and I am humbled to be able to witness the miracle of childbirth as well as assist in it.
Ronn: Q2 – I believe that being a responsible father starts well before birth and that being an active participant during the pregnancy is important. When Joelle (J) was pregnant with my daughter Ravynn, I went to every Dr appointment she had (or as I say “we” had). How often do you see fathers at these appointments? Do they ask questions? Do they participate? Please explain why it is important for fathers to be present and participate at these appointments.
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: It’s important for men to realize that they are not just “accessories” in the process of building families. Their active participation can significantly decrease the stress that an expectant mother feels. I love when dads ask questions about the well being of their unborn child as well as their partner. It warms my heart and I’m sure instills confidence in the expectant partner when they strive to learn more about pregnancy and parenting. I can speak from personal experience that I would not have had such a positive pregnancy and labor experience without the support, encouragement and nurturing of my husband.
Ronn: Q3 – During the pregnancy, I was so focused on the baby’s health that I was afraid to even get into an argument with J because I didn’t want to cause stress to J; so I held in a lot. Please explain why some women turn crazy during a pregnancy. (JUST KIDDING) LOL What are some things that men can do to help to bring harmony during the pregnancy?
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: Of course limiting stressors in an expectant mother’s life is great when possible but that does not require the expectant father to stifle his feelings. Its very important to be emotionally available to her. Pregnancy is a great time for both people to discuss their dreams, fears, excitement and expectations regarding parenthood. Even if it’s not your first time as a parent, every pregnancy and child is different and new dreams, hopes and even anxieties can arise. It’s healthier to share those feelings in a constructive manner than to avoid them. This level of sharing can actually increase intimacy with your partner because she will have further confirmation that you’re “all in.”
With regards to “acting crazy,” please remember that carrying a new life in your body is an exciting but vulnerable time in a woman’s life. There are lots of hormonal changes in addition to the changes in physical appearance. It can at times feel emotionally overwhelming and be an emotional roller coaster.
Ronn: Q4 – Several times I was asked if I was going to be in the delivery room. Initially, that question offended me because as I felt it was important to go to all the prenatal appointments, it was only a given that I would be there for the delivery. Are fathers usually at your deliveries?
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: In this day and age, if the father is involved and available (i,e,; not deployed or incarcerated), he is present for labor and delivery unless their are cultural or religious restrictions. As I mentioned previously, my husband was an integral part of my labor experience. He encouraged me; nurtured me and helped me to focus and stay calm. He also happened to be the first one to hold our baby too. Welcoming a new life into the world is a joyous and miraculous occasion. It’s a precious event that dads shouldn’t miss.
Ronn: Q5 – I was asked if I fainted when I watched my daughter being born. That question was silly to me (of course I didn’t). However, I do remember someone fainting during health class in college when they showed us a childbirth video. I’ll mention no names to protect the guilty! 😉 Have you ever had someone faint during delivery and if so, why does that happen?
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: I can usually spot the squeamish dads a mile away. I usually require them to sit down by mom’s head so that they can be supportive of her without being my third patient. 😉 I usually joke with them and tell them that we’ll take pictures of them laid out on the floor if they pass out. Fortunately, I have never had to take that kind of pic before.
All jokes aside, there’s a role for even the most squeamish dad in the delivery room. Usually, if he focuses on his partner, he forgets about his anxieties. My hubby does hate the sight of blood. He got a bit light headed when I had my blood drawn early in pregnancy but he was amazing in the delivery room!
Ronn: Q5 – What advice would you tell men that they should know that would help them during the pregnancy?
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: Read; ask lots of questions and be an active participant in the whole process. Make sure that she knows how appreciative and amazed you are with all of the changes in her body as well as the anticipated changes in your lives. Enjoy the journey and share your excitement with your partner.
Ronn: Q6 – Ok now I want you to be real honest here… In my DJ business, sometimes when I am doing a couple’s wedding I think to myself, “This couple ain’t gonna be married for long.” Do you ever get that feeling with your pregnant couples? LOL
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: Every baby is a miracle and a blessing! I must admit that it’s extra special when I help welcome babies into the world and their parents are loving and respectful to each other as well as overjoyed with the arrival of their precious little one. I say extra prayers of covering for those who are seemingly born into adversity. I also pray for all of the fathers that they will recognize that their role is just as essential as the mother’s role and that they will remain committed no matter what to their children.
Ronn: Thanks so much for your expertise and guidance Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh! Thank you for participating and being a part of the Happy Daddy’s Club!
Dr. Traci N. Fitzhugh: It’s been my pleasure, Ronn P. Kudos to you and all of the daddy’s out there who are doing their best to be amazing fathers to the children with whom they have been entrusted.
Ronn P